The meat wars
by Kickin' Kori Anders
Summary: What happens when JUmp city has a meat day? Madness, Madness I tell you! A little action and some Robin Star fluff!
1. Chapter 1

The Meat wars ( Nhaaa-na-na-naaa-na–Nhaaaa-na-na-naaa-na- star wars theme)

Disclaimer: As much as I dream of it, I do not own The Teen Titans or Star wars. I'd be rich if that was the case and then I would own Teen Titans.

Beast Boy got up early today; it was the only day of the year that he voluntarily got up at 6:00 am. But today was different. He put on his only bullet proof-padded-no tear-diamond fused- grease proof suit, then his moped helmet (He had planned on getting a moped too, but after he lost his job well…). He opened up his cell phone and waited it to dial.

"Come on, Come on pick up! This is not the day to mess up now!" And like magic, the phone was answered."Yes!"

"Hey General BB, sir!" a young girlish voice spoke.

"Is everything ready?"

"Yes sir, the army and Hose is ready! We are now waiting for your signal in the park at 2:00!" She reported.

"Good job, and be careful! This day is a haunted day now, but it will soon be rejoiced. Over and out!" He hung up the phone and smiled. That was pretty cool to him. Now he could concentrate on living through Jump city's Meat day. That's right, a day when a whole city celebrates the poor, and slaughtered animals that are in their cheeseburgers. But today, beast boy decided, that was going to change.

Cyborg woke up around 8:00 and he happily re-oiled himself while humming. He only hummed when he was working on the T-car; his baby. But today was even better than working on her, today was meat day! The day when jump city embrace the hot, greasy burgers, the saucy, sizzling ribs and the FAT, JUICY STEAKS!

That was only part of it, the other part was BB. It was his favorite part when he sees BB cringe, and gag and in the park, barf. Okay, the barf wasn't **as** funny, but sometimes it was gross and funny at the same time. Oh, that was also really awesome about today.

Every year, The Mayor throws a meat fair in the park and has a celebrity open it. Well, this year he had asked him to open it! He would be able to the open the way to Meatdom come! Then there was the mystery pot. It held a different dessert every year and the person who made it would be revealed with the deserts. Last year it was Granny Goodness with her donut wholes.

Also the mystery pot was huge, big as the warehouses by the docks.

"Huh, I wonder who is the cook this year." He shrugged his shoulders as he head out for breakfast.

Starfire sat at her mirror and brushed her hair. She usually counted to hundred brushes but she wasn't really paying attention, not today. She was thrilled about today. The Mayor's wife had asked her make a Tamereanian dessert for the mystery pot. It was already done, and was in Jump city's biggest freezer that they had built for meat day. She had ordered ingredients from Tamaran just for it. The dish was called Myran, and it had Zorrika berries, candy canes and junyen (basically a cake batter) in it. Together it made a pudding.

She set down her brush and smiled. This was going to be a fun day, even though BB and CY were going to be fighting all day because of the meat. She didn't know that it was going to be literal

Raven groaned as she awoke. Azar no, don't let it be Meat Day. She glanced at her calendar. It was. She groaned again as she got up and changed into a fresh leotard and hooded cape. Good thing she stocked up on tea, because she was going to need it, that and a lot of mediation.

She really didn't want to go to the meat fair where there would be neon colors, high running emotions and people constantly brushing past her. Then idiots one and two would be fighting each other all day, giving her a headache. Great.

"Ugh," she tripped over a book as she stormed in a bad mood out of her room to retrieve herbal tea already.

Robin was on the roof, watching the city start setting up the fair. Today was meat day so the people were busy bees, preparing for the day. He just wanted to sit up here forever so he wouldn't have to spend the day keeping Raven, Cyborg and Beast Boy from killing each other. Really, the only one who was fun to hang out with on meat day was Starfire. But Starfire was always fun to hang out with, she always tried to keep a positive outlook and it rubbed off on him.

He knew he was going to need it. Maybe if there was time he would take Starfire on the Farris wheel. Then possibly he would admit hiss feelin—

"No I have to stay her friend; if a villain ever found out that they were dating her, she uh… the team would get hurt. That was if she liked me too, which she properly doesn't." (a/n:Silly Robin!) He sighed and turned his thoughts back to meat day. He didn't want to drag on this day so he squared his shoulders towards the yelling from the kitchen.

A p 

Well, what do you think? Future chapters are under way so keep you're your pants on please! I'm only allowed on the computer during the weekends so you have to wait until then. Though I need you to review so I can decide whether to keep this going, but I do already have the story in my head. Until next weekend!

KKA


	2. Chapter 2: a new joke

The Meat wars ( Nhaaa-na-na-naaa-na–Nhaaaa-na-na-naaa-na- star wars theme)

Disclaimer: As much as I dream of it, I do not own The Teen Titans or Star wars. I'd be rich if that was the case and then I would own Teen Titans.

Chapter 2: A new Joke

The Titans were all in the living room. Starfire and Robin were chatting quietly, Raven was reading a dusty tome, Beast Boy was preparing some Tofu and Cyborg was pouring cake batter into a pan. The quiet was errie, without the usual yelling it freaked even Raven.

'_What's up with Green Bean? He isn't saying anything about the milk in my pancakes. What's wrong? What is he planning?' _Cyborg thought, looking over his shoulder at Beast Boy.

'_Uh oh, Cy is giving me a hairy eyeball. I need to act normal and keep my guards up. Wait, am I talk- err… thinking to my self?'_ BB shook that thought off and asked

"Okay, why are ducks such good stand up comedians?" Everybody groaned.

"BB, that joke has gone Stale." Robin said, getting a confused look from Starfire.

"Stale? Like those crackers in the back of the cabinet?" She inquired. Robin shook his head with a warm smile.

"No, it means it's been used so much, that the joke isn't funny anymore." She smiled gratefully at him and he blushed against his own will.

"It was funny?" Raven raised an eyebrow but didn't look up from her book.

"Hey! Okay fine, I've used that one up but I've got others! What did the rich Apple say to the homeless grape?" No one answered" You should apple-ly for a job!" Then he laughed while everyone else rolled their eyes.

"Yo, that's not funny! Here's a good one! What do you call an amusement park full of Barbies?"He put his fresh, buttery, golden steaming blueberry pancakes on a paper plate.(A/N:Hungery yet?)

" Ditz-ney land!" Both guys fell on the floor laughing. They rolled around on the floor clutching their stomachs. Beast Boy banged up against the counter and Cy's pancakes fell off of the counter and hit the floor while the Tofu fell on Silkie.

Starfire quickly cleaned up her pet, trying not to gag as she did, while the boys still laughed. Ten minutes later they were still laughing and gasping for air. But they were cut off short by a wrathful Raven. She used her powers to put them in bubbles with air holes so they could hear.

"Here, I have a joke for you. Why did the idiots run across the street while bawling?" She said in a chafed tone and her eyes grew ruby red. Both Beast Boy and Cyborg gulped."To get to the trashed game station on the other side!"

There was an explosion in the next room and Raven then let them out of their bubbles. They both ran screaming in horror to their Game station that was now dust. Robin and Starfire cracked up.

"Best joke I've heard yet!"

"Yes, it was truly glorious!"Raven just muttered

"That's what they get." Then she scooped up her aspirin bottle and tome and went to her room. Starfire turned to Robin. "I am glad friend Raven did that! They certainly needed a new joke!"

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Me: (evil laughter) get it? New hope, new joke! Eh? Eh?

Readers: Boo!

Some guy: You Stink!

Me: well thanks for review all my chapters, I REALLY LOVE FEED BACK! I have my finals this week so I am having half days! I'm trying to squezze in as many chapters as possible until I go out of town next Friday! I know this chapter was short but really it was just for fun

Later alligators!

KKA


	3. Chapter 2: prepareing

The Meat wars ( Nhaaa-na-na-naaa-na–Nhaaaa-na-na-naaa-na- star wars theme)

Disclaimer: I don't own wal-mart or Teen Titans or Star wars or fudge monkeys or LOL c vats or…. Are you just trying to make me depressed?

Sorry about the such short chapters, but this one is a long one I swear!

Chapter 3:

Later, after much weeping from the guys, The Titans all piled into the car and set off early towards the meat fair. When They got there, there was a list in their usual parking space.

_Titans, I need someone to test the Ferris wheel, set up the utensils tent, set up the microphones and sound system and for someone to go and buy extra paper plates._

_-The Mayor_

"Well, it looks like we were expected team. Raven, go set up the utensils tent, Cy set up the sound system and microphones, Beast Boy buys some plates and Me and Star will test out the Ferris wheel." Robin ordered.

"Dude! Why do you and Star get to go on the Ferris wheel?' Beast Boy whined, but with one glare from Raven, he shut up. "Aye, Aye sir!" Beast Boy and Cyborg ran off haistly to their jobs. Raven followed after them, grumbling.

"Come On Star!" Robin called and started to walk towards the humongo wheel.

"Robin," Starfire said softly, which made him stop and turn." I am afraid that I have to do a flavor for the mayor's wife and therefore cannot accompany you." Robin's hopes of telling Starfire how he felt towards her were crushed. He noticed her voice was sad, but he was too busy feeling rejected to do anything about it.

" It's favor Star and have fun…" Star nodded and flew off "I guess." As he turned to go to the Ferris Wheel, he didn't notice the saddened look sent to him by the alien.

A p 

An eagle soared through the sky. He was majestic, powerful and green! It circled over Wal-Mart and then landed by the front doors. The eagle transformed into a green, teenage elf, other known as Beast Boy. Though he wasn't happy to be at Wal-Mart, it did give him an opportunity to get ammo for the oncoming battle at the park. He waltzed through the automatic doors and into the store. Usually Wal-Mart was crowed but today everyone was getting ready for the park, so the store was virtually empty (It's a miracle!). The store was full of shelves carrying every day things to stuff you didn't know existed that was lit by blinding lights.

" Kay, I need to get packages of paper plates, string, straws, a bowling ball, bowls, three gallons of water, some peanut butter, gum…" He recited his mental list as he turned into the paper plate isle. As he reached for the plates on the top shelf when he was wacked on the back of the head so hard that his head jerked forward and smashed into the shelf.

He crouched on the ground and cradled his head."What the hell!" Towering over him was an old lady. She had a death grip on her purse which had blood on it, (whose blood? Bwha ha ha!) and she had fire in her eyes.

"What is in that purse? A brick? A bowling ball? A refrigerator? " Beast Boy glared at the aged woman.

"Carl!" She screeched "You left me all those years ago pregnant and now a catch you kissing another woman?"

"Wha-"The old woman was glaring at the paper plates. She was crazy or blind, Beast Boy decided. "Um, yeah I'm not Carl, who ever that is. I don't even know you!" The lady dropped her purse and slowly pulled up the sleeves of her hand knitted sweater. She spun around and showed her razor-sharp, blood red nails. She pinned him up against a shelf and pointed it at his jugular.

"You abandon me in 63', then I find you 53 years later kissing a hag, and now you say you don't even know me? I- I…." Her face softened "I love you!" She pulled Beast Boy into a kiss. He screamed against the wrinkly gal's lips and turned into a mouse. Then her skittered towards the paper plates, turned into a vulture, scooped up the paper plates and zoomed away from her.

"Wait! Come back Carl!" She screamed and ran after him.

A p 

Cyborg crouched behind the speakers with a box of tools and a bottle of oil next to him. The speakers were on a neon colored stage surrounded by soft, green grass, meat tents, and a bright blue sky sprinkled with clouds. The breeze blew softly as Cy rolled his shoulders and stood up. He had been working on the speakers for a while and had a Charlie horse in his butt.

"Stupid spikey haired freak, I'd like him to sit here and fix these speakers. I wish someone would help me…."

"Hey Sparky!" Cyborg screamed like a little girl, tripped and face planted. "Oww!"

"Sorry, didn't mean to scare you, "Bumble Bee stood over him and stuck out her hand "Didn't know you were such a fraidy cat." Cyborg took her hand and stood up. He glared at her and then smiled.

"Bee! What are you doing here?"

"Well, I heard bout' meat day and decided to check it out. Besides, I couldn't give up an opportunity to eat free meat!" Cyborg chuckled.

"It would be nice to have someone back me up about how good meat is against BB." Bee smiled at this. She always thought their squabbles were cute; especially Cyborg.

"Sure," She looked over Cyborg's shoulder with her eye brows raised. "Need help with the speakers?" It was like Cyborg's wish came true.

A p 

Robin moped as he reached the top of the Ferris wheel. Up there was a beautiful view of the busy city, Emerald Park and red and purple meats tents. The sky was the shade of Safire but Robin was too deep in his thoughts to notice.

"_Way, to go Boy Blunder. She properly didn't want to go with you because she doesn't like to hang around you." _The sad Robin in his head said.

"_Shut up, you big mopey Mary! He just was a big wimp!" _The angry Robin replied_ " Be more assertive! You asked Babs out before several times before she said yes, do the same damn thing!"_

" _Don't listen to them, " _Wise Robin corrected his glasses _" Starfire likes you a lot, enough to call you a Best Friend. Also, she said she had to do something for the mayor's wife, and said sorry. This indicates that she wanted to go with you, I say."_Wise Robin's words soothed the real Robin, because he knew that was properly the truth.

"_Yeah Rob, though I don't think she sees you as a friend, but as soul mate!"_ Love Robin (who was dressed in pink much to the other's dismay) said to the real Robin and turned to Angry, sad, and wise Robin _"Right guys?"_

"_Well—" _Wise started but angry burst in.

"_Hey! He was talking to me!"_ Wise got up in angry's face_. "No, he was talking to me!"_ Angry round housed wise and got a swift kick in the stomach in return. They both pulled out their bow staffs and attacked each other with determination.

" _No one talks to me!" _sad moaned as the angry robin sacked the wise one. The real Robin on the Ferris wheel shook his head. Though he decided to believe in wise and maybe even in love.

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Raven slowly but swiftly used her powers to take forks, spoons, and knives out of their bags and placed them neatly on the table. She grumbled about taking the steak knives and shoving up BB and Cy's where the sun don't shines. She was still grumbling when over the radio a song started to play.

"**(I miss you, I miss you)"  
>Hello there, the angel from my nightmare<br>The shadow in the background of the morgue"**

Raven unconsciously sighed dreamily. She always wished that Beast Boy would sing this to her. Then she wouldn't be so moody all the time.  
><strong>"The unsuspecting victim of darkness in the valley<br>We can live like Jack and Sally if we want"  
><strong>Raven started to hum and spin around while still setting up the tent. If anyone else saw her she would have looked like a gothic Disney princess. As she did this she imagined beat Boy hugging her, kissing her tenderly….

"**Where you can always find me  
>We'll have Halloween on Christmas<br>And in the night we'll wish this never ends  
>We'll wish this never ends"<br>**Raven's powers branched for her hands as she sang along. She was actually smiling. She twirled with her arms in the air.

"**(I miss you, I miss you)  
>(I miss you, I miss you)<strong>

**Where are you and I'm so sorry  
>I cannot sleep I cannot dream tonight<br>I need somebody and always  
>This sick strange darkness<br>Comes creeping on so haunting every time  
>And as I stared I counted<br>Webs from all the spiders  
>Catching things and eating their insides<br>Like indecision to call you  
>and hear your voice of treason<br>Will you come home and stop this pain tonight  
>Stop this pain tonight"<br>**Raven stopped and looked around her, she noticed all of her work was done. She laughed to herself and swayed to the music.

"**Don't waste your time on me you're already  
>The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)<br>Don't waste your time on me you're already  
>The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)<br>Don't waste your time on me you're already  
>The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)<br>Don't waste your time on me you're already  
>The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)<br>**

**Don't waste your time on me you're already  
>The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)<br>Don't waste your time on me you're already  
>The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)<strong>

Music covered the sounds of footsteps outside the tents and the "Duuuuuuuuuudddddddeeee!"

**Don't waste your time on me you're already  
>The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)<br>Don't waste your time on me you're already  
>The voice inside my head (I miss you, I miss you)<strong>

**(I miss you, I miss you) **

**(I miss you, I miss you)**

**(I miss you, I miss you)**

**(I miss you, I miss you)**

Raven finished singing and but was still full of a fluffy feeling and hope. Maybe today wasn't going to be so bad. Then Beast Boy rushed in screaming " Dude, Rae! Help me! I-" He stopped when he saw that raven was actually smiling and still swaying to the music that was at it's end. "What's wrong?" His eyes widened and he tottaly forgot the old lady who thought he was carl.

"Nothing, just got cut up in a song and don't call me Rae." Raven closed her eyes, frowning and blushing at the same time and put her hood up. She started to walk out of the tent but was stopped by Beast Boy's voice.

"You know, Rae you should smile more often. It's cute." Raven smiled from under her hood with her back still to him.

'Thanks," She looked over her shoulder "Beast Man." Beast Boy smiled warmly as she walked away. Then it him; today the vengeance against meat would be post poned until he did something no one with a brain dared to do. He was going to sing something to her. For her.

"Aaaaaand that was 'I miss you by blink-182…" The Radio anuccer said but then after wards his voice blocked out by Beast Boy.

"Yes!" he did a victory dance "Now if can just convince the band to play it…."

A p 

Starfire strained to pick up the 50,097 pound bowl of alien food. Slowly she carried the pot over the city and the park.

"Whew!" She wiped the sweat off of her forehead. Then she heard the beep that signaled that all of the Titans were supposed to go onto the stage. She levitated of the ground and quickly clapped her hands together.

"Glorious!" She was quicker than the flash as she eagerly took off. The park now was flooding with meat lovers wearing meat t-shirts, shoes and even hats that looked like a KFC bucket. They were all cheering as they saw the Titans (Including Bumble Bee), the mayor and the mayor's wife all on stage.

"Titans, I here by present you with the sacred scissors of ceremony! Please, cut the ribbon to the Meat table of awesomeness!"

"You mean the ones that say that they were made in china?" Raven said in a flat monotone. The Mayor sweat dropped. Cyborg took the scissors and made his way up towards the huge red ribbon that guarded a huge tower of meat with chicken, steaks, burned ends, ribs, duck, platypus, goose, every kind of meat there was.

He opened the scissors and swiftly brought them to a close over the ribbon. It delicately broke in two and floated to the ground.

"Now!" yelled a girl of fourteen and the crowd's roar interpreted by the ground shaking furiously. People started to scream at the shaking which seemed like 20 earth quakes together. Then the Ferris wheel rumbled and Beast Boy took cover laughing. As a hose emerged from the star in the middle of the wheel. It spurted a white liquid and everyone one instantly knew what it was from the smell.

A p 

Yes! Cliffhanger!

Sorry about being late with this chapter but it is really a long one! Also right now I have an upper repertory infection so I'm coughing so hard I shake the table when I do. It makes it hard to type I still managed it! The next chapter will arrive next week and maybe another Rae/BB one shot, I dunno.

Later alligators!

KKA


	4. Chapter 4:The battle for the ferris star

The Meat wars ( Nhaaa-na-na-naaa-na–Nhaaaa-na-na-naaa-na- star wars theme)

Disclaimer: if I did, Terra would come back with a mustache!

Sorry, I am later on this one than with the others, but between karate and typing up a story for my friend's birthday, I've been pretty busy! But do not fret, this a chapter! (duh!) There's pretty much only one more chapter after this, but this chapter is what the story is named for!

Chapter 4: the battle begins!

**Last chapter….**

"**Now!" yelled a girl of fourteen and the crowd's roar interpreted by the ground shaking furiously. People started to scream at the shaking which seemed like 20 earth quakes together. Then the Ferris wheel rumbled and Beast Boy took cover laughing. As a hose emerged from the star in the middle of the wheel. It spurted a white liquid and everyone one instantly knew what it was from the smell.**

A p 

Cyborg especially wanted to blow chunks as the wave of liquid Tofu came down upon the park like the asteroids on the dinosaur. It patted like rain as it hit the ground. Raven's eye twitched and Robin's mask narrowed while Cyborg stood there dumbfound. Starfire winced at the smell, and gazed upon the crowd who also looked pretty shocked or just plain pissed. They all knew who the one who did the deed.

"Beast Boy!" Robin yelled and Beast Boy stuck out his head from behind the stage, completely untouched y tofu. His face was dominated (Look ma! Big words!) by a smirk.

"Yeeeees?"

"BB, you in some deep shit—I'm going to kill you! Look at all of the meat gone to waste!" Cyborg shrieked. Apparently he had snapped out of his shock and now was pointing to the giant meat tower which was completely covered by the tofu. All of the park started to inch towards Beast boy.

"Nope, because I think guys underestimate vegetarians. Rock on veggies!" Beast Boy pumped his hand into the air and on cue, a girl appeared in a tall oak at the back of the crowd. She had a kaki hat on that pushed her violet hair that was mostly in a ponytail over her eyes, blocking them from view. She wore an gorillaz t-shirt and jean-shorts with little Dc tennis shoes. She looked no older than 14 and her face had a small smirk on it. She hung to the tree wither her legs and an arm wrapped around it, and in her other hand was a huge squirt gun full of soy sauce.

"Chaaarge!" She cried and from what seems out of nowhere, people of every age and skin color popped up. They were all wearing bright neon green T-shirts with the words in big, bold and red letters said; Eat animals and I eat you! They all had various weapons of tofu in their hands; some with squirt guns with soft tofu in them, others with hard tofu lasers, and various with tofu shaped fire crackers, apples that were hard as diamonds, and tofu milk acid.

Everyone else in the park sweat dropped as the army charged towards the meat tent. But the meat lovers suddenly brought out weapons of their own from the untouched tents of meat. They carried sausage link nun chucks, and BBQ sauce cannons, Bacon bombs and salami roll light saber, and beef bone javelins and chicken leg tasers. They rushed to towards the vegetarian army.

"Booya! " Cyborg's sonic cannon filled up with BBQ sauce and he rushed away from his own meat army and towards Beast Boy who had a hard tofu laser. As they clashed with each other, Robin shrugged his shoulders ,picked up a fallen salami stick and joined the battle; leaving a very annoyed Raven and confused and worried Starfire.

From the stage they could see the sea of red meat lovers and green vegetarians. Their yells could be heard on the other side of town and were so various that the mayor his under a table with his hand over his eyes. Raven rolled her eyes at the scene as A tofu lover got wacked upside the head with a salami stick. The Vegetarians started to get the upper hand, so the Cyborg blocked a squirt of soft tofu and yelled

"Get the spam can!" Another rumbling shook the park, and the huge pot of alien food shook with it. A tank made out of spam cans rumbled into the crowd, scaring the vegetarians; forcing them to fall back. The tank smelled highly of salt as it began to shoot spam at the crowd, causing many screams and oofs. Tents began to fall and Robin back flipped laughing to avoid being hit.

And the battle went on and the pot of alien started to rock back and forth. Back and forth. Back and forth. Back and forth. Over and over and over until the alien desert started to slosh over the sides. Starfire and Raven realized what was going to happen and flew and tried to stop the pot's rocking. But the pot's shadow grew over them as it began its decent to the ground.

Meanwhile Cyborg and Best Boy slashed at each other with a Pepperoni stick and hard Tofu stick and each time was blocked. Cyborg pushed his stick to Beast boy's and leaned into his face.

"Young Gar Skywalker, I have your grandmother!" He pulled away quickly and stepped to the side to reveal….. The old lady from Wal-Mart.

"Carl!" She screeched making everyone around her shiver. Beast Boy dropped his weapon and got down on his knees.

"Nooooooooooo—eeep!" A shadow grew over the bunch and Beast Boy pointed behind Cyborg and the old woman. They turned and were met face to face with Starfire's pink, alien desert. Everyone in the park was washed off their feet by the wave, and were now coated in Tofu, BBQ sauce and alien food. They all groaned as they got up and continued to fight again.

No one notice that Starfire stood next to the now empty park; also covered in Tofu, meat, alien and much more. Except on her cheeks where her tears carved to narrow paths. No one noticed when she bowed her head as BBQ sauce hit the back of head with a splat; and no one notice as she slowly walked over to the tree trunk, sit down and start to weep uncontrollably.

No one except Raven, as she walked over to Starfire and sat with as she wept.

A p 

I felt pretty sad writing that. Only one more chapter, that is properly going to be long. Sorry, this chapter is short but I'm not really good at writing fight scenes yet; any tips? I'm going to write the sequel to Girl's night out before the chapter that's next. Got a lot planned, but I'm working my butt off for the finally!

KKA


	5. Chapter 5: The end!

The Meat wars ( Nhaaa-na-na-naaa-na–Nhaaaa-na-na-naaa-na- star wars theme)

Disclaimer: if I did, Trigon would have a moustache!

Okay, last chapter guys, this is coming later than what I hoped for—but here it is!

The Meat Wars: The Side Splitting Finally!

Raven sat beside the silently weeping Starfire as the Meat War raged on. Pure fury boiled in Raven's stomach as she watched the idiots slap each other around with Salami and Mozzarella. _How could they make Starfire cry like this? _She angrily thought; then something hit her.

"Starfire, why are you crying? Not for yourself—is it?" Starfire sat there for a minete not saying anything, not even crying. Then…

"I'm crying for them Raven," Her eyes widened. She was crying for Beast boy, and Cyborg and all of those people fighting out on the park's field. This just pissed Raven off 10xs more. She stood up with determination, and she was ready for this madness to end. And then….. She was sprayed in the face with tofu milk. The horrifying stench leaked off of her, her eyes began to glow red as she stalked over the crowd and cowering veggie team member.

"You Morons!" she growled as she grew taller and taller; frightening the crowd so much they froze, even Slade who was wearing a bright, neon pink meat t-shirt over his armor stopped. A little oil tricked down Cyborg's leg which made every one step away from him in disgust. But all stared wide- eyed at Raven as she started he rant.

"Look at you! You have acted like complete douche bags all day! Because of this fucking meat war, you've wasted all this town's food, money and hard work! Plus, you made Star fire cry! And another thing—"As she continued trees, cars and people zoomed around in a black aura. Black tentacles shot out of her cloak sucking in a squirrel.

Beast boy fell to his knees and cried "!" Everyone, including Raven paused for a moment to stare with raised eye brows at him who just smiled sheepishly at them and shrugged his shoulders. Then Raven continued

"And what the heck is a wookie? And a 'spam can"? How originally, did you get that off the back of a cereal box? And did I say how much I hate American Idol? They sound like what wookies would sound like if they sang; if I knew what a wookie was!" By this time Raven's out of control powers were ripping patches of grass and street out of the ground.

Everyone was terrified when; because of a miracle; Beast Boy had an idea. It was a long shot, but he hoped it was enough. He walked up to the still ranting Raven, Jumped up, grabbed her by the shoulders and kissed her. Raven's eyes lost their glow and she automatically shrinked back to the ground; he lips were still locked with Beast Boy's. She flopped down on her butt as she broke away from Beast Boy and said in a matter-of fact tone

"I'll shut up now," Mean while every one else stood there in shock but Starfire was the first to shake the confusion from her little orange head.

"She is right," every one looked at her with question, "Not the wookie part." Every one let out a sigh of relief. "But it is true; the town has paid much for this supposedly wonderful day. Many chefs worked hard for this celebration." People slowly turned their heads around to find people weeping over cake and meat and Tofu. They looked down at their feet. "And look at this mess! It shall take a long time to clean up all of this; the park will not be free for children and pets to run freely in. Today in ruined."

She was crouched down next to Raven but then stood and walked over to a shamed Beast Boy and Cyborg with her hands behind her back. Raven saw what she was holding and her lips curled slightly upwards at the sight._ 'Good girl,' _ Starfire seemed to tower over the two boys, even though Cyborg was much taller than her. Beast Boy and Cyborg stared down at their feet so, they had no way to know what was coming.

"So now, I only have one thing to say," The whole park held their breath, ready for the outburst of alien cussing. Instead, she quickly smacked them both on the top of their heads and the handfuls of tofu, meat and alien food oozed on their heads. "Food fight." Starfire finished with a smirk. Beast Boy and Cyborg's heads shot upwards as the screamed for the whole world to know,

"Food Fight!" They scooped up the mixture of food and chucked some at Starfire and Raven who returned fire at will. Then Starfire smacked Robin with food and then the whole team was tossing food at each other wildly. Everyone else in the park simply shrugged their shoulders and joined in. This was not so much a meat war anymore, more like a lets-see-who –can-wipeout-your-friends –first-with-this-stuff war.

In the middle of the fight, Robin and Starfire got pushed back to back as they fought off the others with this new breed of food.

"So, you're not too upset about today?" He whispered over his shoulder and into her ear.

"Actually, I am still quite, the pissed but I had to do something to make this day slightly glorious!" Robin smiled at her answer and the fact that he just nailed Beast boy in the face with tofu. He didn't expect what came next—she leaned over and very softly she gave Robin a kiss on the cheek; Robin turned as bright as his shirt and Starfire giggled

"I knew that this what help, "and with that she ran off too go drown Slade in meat. Robin sat there for a minute; in complete awe and shock he startled the park by screaming

"!" He went back to the fight but in the distance Starfire smiled happily as she poned everyone around her. Mean while Raven had taken to targeting Beast Boy, and they were now on the out skirts of the park; dodging and twirling, tossing and blocking they fought….. one might even say, playfully? They were both laughing, and as she stepped out the way of a clump of alien food she formed a plan.

With a smirk on her pale face she tossed a chunk of tofu at Beast Boy; by just missing slightly, she made Beast Boy jump right in front of her—in perfect position to be jumped on. Raven took that opening and flung herself on top of him, knocking them both to the green grass.

"Hi," Beast Boy smiled sheepishly because their faces were only inches apart. Raven skipped the flirting and kissed him; she sat there for a moment pursed on his lips. When she finally pulled back, she stared down on a dreamy Beast Boy and remarked

"That's for earlier." With that said, she got up, and strode back to the crowd, smiling as she heard rapid foot steps behind her. Mean while, meanwhile Bumble Bee sat alone on the stage, tired from all of the fighting.

"Hey, Bee," Bee smiled as she recognized the voice. "Hey, sparky." Cyborg sat down next to her and held out a untainted slice of pepperoni to her, which she accepted. They sat there for a moment, not saying a word and watching the scene before them; they heard Robin's "Woooooooooooooooooooooo!" and saw in the distance BB and Raven kissing, people being smacked with foods and laughter filled their ears. Cyborg's hand found Bee's and their fingers entwined.

"Happy Meat day, Sparky."

"Happy meat day, Bee."

Done! It is finished! Sorry to be late about this, but I just got a bombard ant of ideas that I plan to post soon! Review please; how did I handle the couples? I personally feel like I screwed up Cy and Bee. I could be right, I could be wrong, and that's why I need you to review!


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